"Why should I wear a dress? I'm not going anywhere special."
It's just made of cotton, not silk. It won't blind your spirited bystanders' eyeballs with its pristine glory.
To address any confusions you might have- so far until the second sentence of my first blog post- this applies to any romper, fancy scarf, pair of cigarette pants, trench-coat, or bracelet you kept away because everybody else was okay with hoodies and sweatshirts, or because it wasn't picture day, or because you weren't meeting your beau's parents.
Imagine skipping the dress one day, and in a parallel world you got that job you always wanted because of it. It's not just a dress; it's a detail, a fragment of something huge, and a tiny link in the butterfly effect. Everybody takes the easy way out, what makes you special is your effort. I don't think a dress would open doors, but it would push you into an open door. Every time your conscious brain makes you save that denim skater for a 'special occasion', a piece of that Customize button dies and its decomposing carcass is devoured heartily by the Randomize button, that's how bad it is. News flash, every occasion is special.
As cheesy as that sounds, think about it. If it aids your happiness on that one day, imagine it doing that for you everyday. That is something we have probably heard a lot, when it comes to fashion. 'Dress nice everyday', 'put in effort', 'if you look good, you feel good', etc. But that's not the point.
The question isn't why the nice dress is for the special occasion, the question is why is it a dress that's 'nice' for you, why not a suit. Is the dress nicer than your sweatpants and why won't you wear it more often even though you feel that way about dresses?'.
It isn't even about dressing 'better' or putting in more efforts, it's about connecting with who you are. If you're intentionally suppressing the dress, you're probably also intentionally suppressing your femininity because 'you're not like other girls'. Everybody is probably like somebody so nobody is winning here, better just do what you truly want instead of missing out on an opportunity because somebody could feel that you weren't fully connected to your essence.
'Will that weird boy in class tease me if I suddenly dress different?'
'Will my coworkers think I'm trying too hard.'
With that attitude, probably, yes.
It's a complete package. The personality, the posture, the outfit, it all has to feel like a compound, not a mixture. It has to be cohesive. Those girls who can do this flawlessly, they were born with it, but so were you. The only difference is, when that one male friend suggested you should wear more dresses, because he is a keen observer and he saw delicate, soft undertones in your body and persona and saw you secretly being into feminine things, you snapped at him and told him you 'won't let a misogynist tell you what to do' because apparently that's what you think feminism is. Spoilers, he doesn't go around telling every girl they should wear a dress, and not because he has a little-boy crush on you and he thinks you'd be wife material that way, but because he is a great friend who genuinely believes you would feel more like yourself that way.
But that's a whole another discussion for another day.
Change is never bad if it makes you better. Change is often beautiful. Do you want to keep being a weird caterpillar thing that has a major transformation to go through, or do you want to be a butterfly? Unless you embrace this fact, you'll end up becoming a slightly fancy slimy mid-cocoon caterpillar at best, if at all. Also, biology clearly isn't my area of expertise.
And if being feminine isn't for you, by subconscious choice, that's wonderful, you're doing amazing, and I'm happy for you. But suppressing your femininity because of delusions, defensiveness, or just plain anxiousness can change so much in so many little or big ways.
So why should you wear a dress?
Because you're a strong independent lady and wearing a dress doesn't take away from it.
Because holding back is often toxic.
Because Marilyn Monroe wore one out and about on the streets and she was a legend.
Because it makes your tiny little waist curvier.
Because your hair that you always keep tied up in a ponytail, looks gorgeous when it just falls short of the belt.
Because it shows off both long and sleek, and short curvy legs. It's a win-win.
Because it's not just a piece of clothing, it's your impression.
Because there is nothing wrong with dressing up for yourself.
Because you said no without even trying it on once.
Because no man can tell you what to wear... so don't feel obligated to wear masculine clothes if you don't genuinely feel like it, just to be 'different' or fit in with the boys.
Because life is too short to not do what you want.
Because I would be really proud of you if you did it for yourself.
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